Identity

I am different with different people. I am mostly the same with my friends, but at home, due to personal circumstances I assume a completely different identity. Call me paranoid, but the two hardly overlap, unless there is a considerable degree of trust involved. My online identity is the self I cannot be in reality; an extreme version of myself. It is, to me a third identity, the "me" I want to be but cannot in real life. It serves, often as an escape from my home life, helping me to (subtly, of course) air out my grievances with my home life. It allows me to talk to my friends about problems, or even just gossip. However, as I learnt, the more extreme that my life online was, the emotions resulting from my two realities colliding online was much worse . For example, a few weeks ago, a friend of my father, and therefore my family, sent me a Friend Request on FaceBook. The resulting confusion (over what to do), befuddlement, panic and anxiety it caused was consequently also much greater than if I had bumped into her on the street. The fact that she could see my photos, my posts, my friends, basically most aspects of my life, and the fact that she was free to form her own opinions and make her own judgments from them, and the fact that they could get back to my family here caused me no end of panic. In the end, however, I found a way to block only her from viewing my Wall, or my Photos - a concept I'd never have known otherwise.

In the reading about identities and anonymity on Her@, I found myself identifying mostly with Noorie, the woman who posted her angst towards her misogynistic husband. The internet, especially the Status Bar on FaceBook, allows me to tell the world I feel bad, and then have a friend ask me what's wrong and comfort me, thus allowing me to move on almost instantaneously. However, the public aspect of putting even something as remotely personal as this worries me. Even on the blog, people seem to be quite comfortable sharing personal details of their lives that pertain to New Media, even if it is to prove a point. The anonymity of it (to other users) may be a factor, or the fact that the class is so big that jusgment is not an issue from somebody you haven't met, or even possibly due to the fact that we can feel safe from judgment thanks to the administration of the blog and the paper.

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